So what to post on Facebook now?

Now that I have decided not to post any political stuff on Facebook for that matter anything that might activate grey cells, what is it that I am going to use Facebook wall for? Well after observing my social media contacts, I have managed to create extensive list of all exciting things that one can do on Facebook

  • Random Nature PhotosAction Item : Buy a DSLR. In today’s world one can not get respectability if you are not clicking few snaps using a DSLR. Also its important to be able to talk about specifications of a DSLR. Talking about Smart Phones is so passé
  • Photoshopped pics of victims of rape, murder,accidents. The more nauseating photo I can get the better. This is absolutely essential. It shows how socially aware you are. You also get to criticize others for not having a social conscience.
  • Cute Puppies,Kittens,Rabits – Doesn’t matter if you like a hot dog or luv eating a rabbit. But you have to post these. And yes when someone else posts them you are obligated to comment “how chweeeeet, ummmm chooo cuteeeeee”. If you do non’t do that , be ready to be included in the list of dangers to world peace
  • The food that I am eating – Always remember world is full of hungry people. You are the only person who eats good food. And hence everyone should know what you are eating. If you have a photo better, if recipe nothing like it
  • Happy new year…happy diwali..happy birthday..happy pilgrims day..happy freindship day…valentines day ..fathers day…mothers day…earth day…- Not worried too much about this. I am already creating a python script which will automatically parse various calendars and everyday morning post this stuff on my wall, based on appropriate occasion. viola !! I am socially acceptable now
  • Rants about a facebook contacts without naming them e.g. Why do “some people” burp so loud, Why cant “some people” stop talking behind my back?
  • Posting my own pics to which every contact will mandatorily respond “looking awesome, how cute…” with expectation that I wud respond to their pics in same fashion

Aaah …what a long list. Everyday morning I will be looking forward to my first peek at FB wall, first FB post. Happy days are here again.


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